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| Bollywood jokes in hindi |
Bollywood jokes in hindi
In Bullet Raja...
Saif is playing Raja and Sonakshi is playing Bullet 500 cc.
👉Abhishek Bacchan : I_can_act_too@yuva.com
Amitabh Bacchan : accept_any_role@after.kaunbanegacrorepati.tv
Anil Kapoor : expert@copyingsouthindianmovies.com
Salman Khan : why_do_I_always_get_into_trouble@needagirlfriend.com
Shah Rukh Khan : over_emotions@mostmovies.com
Ram Gopal Varma : same_formula@bombayunderworld.co.in
Sunil Shetty : hoping_to_be@indianarnold.com
Aamir Khan : whats_up_with_the_hairstyle@mangalpande.com
Aamir Khan (alternateaddress): married_or_not@toomanyaffairs.com
Saif Ali Khan : goofy_roles@suitsmeperfect.com
Hritik Roshan : main_aisa_kyon_hoon@howtheheckdoweknow.com
Hritik Roshan (alternateaddress): main_aisa_kyon_hoon@askyourdad.com
Ajay Devgan : finally_I_started_to_act@aftersomanyyears.com
Bobby Deol : no one_thinks_I_can_act@getanotherjob.com
Sunny Deol: He is still busy fighting Pakistani soldiers. Mail address is a secret.
Urmila : ramgopalvarma_has_forgotten_me@nomorerangeela.com
Mallika Sherawat : I_dont_need_to_act@overexposureworks.com
Amisha Patel : Kaho_na_pyaar_hai@wasmyonlyhit.com
Kareena Kapoor : oh_iam_so_cute_and_talented@nobodyelsethinksso.com
Raveena Tandon : waiting_for_third_umpire@stumped.com
👉3 Idiots ( Fb version )
Rancho - *Smiling*
Teacher- Aap Muskura kyu rahe hain?
Rancho - Bohot Dino se Admin banne ki iccha
thi...aj Ban gaya hu..bohot maza aa raha hai
Teacher- Zada Maza Lene Ki Zarurat nai
hai...Tell me What is a Post?
Rancho- Anything that is posted on
Facebook..is Post Sir
Teacher- Can you Please elaborate?
Rancho- sir..jo bhi Facebook pe log daalte
hai ,post hai sir...Ghumne... gye..photo daal
diya! Post hai Sir.. Match dekha Score daal diya! Post hai Sir ..Sir actually hum post se ghire hue hai sir! Katrina ki Pic se Ronaldo ki Kick tak!
Sab post hai sir! Ek second me Comment ,ek
second me like!
Comment-like.. comment-like
Teacher- Shut up! ADMIN banke ye karoge?
Comment-like comment like....
Hey chatur tum batao
Chatur- Pictures,texts or Videos posted
through Mobile or Tablet or laptop or desktop
via Different Operating system using Internet on Facebook is called a Post...
Teacher- excellent!
Rancho- par sir maine bhi toh vohi bola
seedhe shabdo mein...
Teacher- Seedhe shabdo me karna hai toh
orkut ya twiter ke pages k admin bano... :@
Rancho- Par sir dusre sites bhi toh..
Teacher-Get out!
Rancho- why sir?
teacher- Seedhe Shabdo me bahar jaiye
Rancho goes out and Comes Back
Teacher- kya hua?
Rancho- kuch Bhul gya tha sir
Teacher- Kya?
Rancho- protect our Private data i.e pictures messages
or personal Information for being stolen or Used for bad purpose by hackers or anyone else...
Teacher- kehna kya chahte ho!?!?
Rancho- logout sir! Logout karna bhul gya tha!
Teacher- seedha seedha nai bol sakte the?!
Rancho- thodi der pehle try kiya tha sir, aapko pasand nahi aaya...
Bollywood Jokes in Hindi for Status
👉Real names of Bollywood stars
Aamir Khan – Aamir Hussain Khan
Ajay Devgan – Vishal Devgan
Ajit – Hamid Ali Khan
Akshay Kumar – Rajiv Bhatia
Amitabh Bachchan – Amit Srivastav
Ashok Kumar – Kumud Ganguly
Bobby Deol – Vijay Singh Deol
Dev Anand – Devdutt Pishorimal Anand
Dharmendra – Dharam Singh Deol
Dilip Kumar – Yusuf Khan
Govinda – Govinda Arun Ahuja
Jeetendra – Ravi Kapoor
John Abraham – Farhan Abraham
Johnny Lever – Badruddin Qazi
Kamal Haasan- Alwarpettai Aandavar
Kumar Gaurav – Manoj Tulli
Lucky Ali – Maqsood Mehmood Ali
Madhubala – Mumtaz Jehan Begum Dehlavi
Mahima Chaudhry – Ritu Chaudhry
Mallika Sherawat – Reema Lamba
Manoj Kumar – Hare Krishna Goswami
Nana Patekar – Vishwanath Patekar
Raj Kumar – Kulbushan Pandit
Rajesh Khanna – Jatin Khanna
Rajnikant – Sivaji Rao Gaekwad
Rekha – Bhanurekha Ganesan
Salman Khan- Abdul Rashid Salim Salman Khan
Sanjeev Kumar – Haribhai Jarivala
Shammi Kapoor – Shamsher Raj Kapoor
Shashi Kapoor – Balbirraj Kapoor
Sunil Dutt – Balraj Dutt
Sunny Deol – Ajay Singh Deol
Tuntun - Uma devi
👉After ishq wala love what next do you expect from Bollywood
Chai wali tea, Hawa wali wind, Kutta wala dog.
👉Which Bollywood Film is your most awaited among 2013 releases ?
1-Dhoom 3 ( Aamir, Katrina )
2-Murder 3 ( Randeep, Aditi )
3-Bullet Raja ( Saif, Sonakshi)
4-Krrish 3 ( Hrithik, Priyanka)
5-Lootera ( Ranveer, Sonakshi )
6-Ragini MMS 2 ( Sunny Leone )
7-Ram Leela ( Ranveer, Deepika )
8-Sher Khan ( Salman )
9-Phata Poster Nikla Hero ( Shahid, Ileana )
10-Gunday ( Ranveer, Arjun, Priyanka )
11-Matru Ki Bijlee Ka Mandola ( Imran, Anushka )
12-Once Upon A Time Again ( Akshay, Imran, Sonakshi )
13-Shootout at Wadala ( John, Kangna )
14-Namak ( Shahid, Sonakshi)
15-Bombay Velvet ( Ranbir, Anushka )
16-Ek Thi Dayan ( Emraan, Kankona, Kalki )
17-P.K ( Aamir, Anushka )
18-Special Chabbis ( Akshay, Kajal )
19-Milan Talkies ( Imran, Priyanka )
20-Zanjeer ( Ram Charan, Priyanka, Sanjay )
21-Ghanchakkar ( Emraan, Vidya )
22-Chennai Express ( Shah Rukh, Deepika )
23-Happy New Year ( Shah Rukh )
24-Satyagraha ( Ajay, Big B, Kareena )
25-Bhaag Milkha Bhaag ( Farhan, Sonam )
26-Yeh Jawani Hai Deewani ( Ranbir, Deepika )
27-Race 2 ( Saif, John, Deepika, Jacqueline )
28-Naam Hai Boss ( Akshay )
29-Himmatwala ( Ajay, Tamanna )
30-Siddharth Anand Next ( Hrithik, Katrina )
AND SHARE IT WITH OTHERS
👉Q: What would Elvis be doing if he was alive right now?
A: Clawing at the inside of his coffin!
Q: Where does the Black Forest cuckoo live?
A: In the Gateau...
Q: What's green and sings?
A: Elvis Parsely
Q: What's stiff and excites women?
A: Elvis Presley!
Q: What is the difference between Elvis and smart blondes?
A: Elvis has been sighted!
Q: What was Elvis's last great hit?
A: The bathroom floor!
Q: What's a dog's fave song?
A: Ain't nuttin but a hound dog!!
Q: Why was Elvis called the 'Pelvis'?
A: Because after decomposition that's probably all that's left of him by now!
New Bollywood Jokes
👉Ever imagined how it would be when we see Bollywood stars in BPO industry, taking calls of the customers.
We dont feel pity for bollywood, but what will happen to customers. God! save them…
Amitabh: Thank you for calling customer care. Rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagate hain filhaal ek customer care agent hain.
Customer: (angrily) I NEED YOUR MANAGER
Amitabh: Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere baap ko chor kaha tha. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne meri maa ko gaali dekar naukri se nikaal diya tha. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere haath pe yeh likh diya tha. uske baad, uske baad mere bhai, Tum jis manager ko kahoge main laaonga.
Dharmendra: Thank you for calliiiiingg. .
Customer: I need help
Dharmendra: main aa raha hoon maa.
Customer: I am unable to use your product, its waste and worthless.
Dharmendra: Kutte mein tera khoon pee jaaonga.
Customer: What!!! I need your manager
Dharmendra: (To his manager)Manager is customer ke saamne mat naachna
Shatru : Aaaaaiiin Kis ullllu ke patthe ne call kiya hai.
Customer : How dare you speak like that
Shatru : Khaaaamoshhhhh, seedhi tarah bolde issue kya hai warna, haaaaaaaaa!! !
Asrani: hahhaaaaaaa naya kabutar ne call kiya
Customer: I lost my invoice
Asrani : Hahhaaaaaaaa hamare jasoos kone kone mein phaile hue hain mil jayegi. Hum angrezon ke zamaane ke agent hain..haahhaaa
Kestu Mukherji: Iiiiiihhhhye.
Customer: hi
Kestu Mukherji : iiiihhhyeee tumko, tumko kya problem hai
Customer : I have not received my product
Kestu Mukherji : To saale (hicup) main kya karoon. Police mien report likha..
Shakti: AAAuuuuuu… mera naam hai balllllllllma. Thank you for calling aaauuuuu
Customer: I need your manager
Shakti: Mujhse baat karona. Main ek chhota sa, nanha sa, pyara sa agent hooon..
Mehmood: Ayyo Dyevi … thank you ji for calling ji.. Ayyo
Customer : I am not devi
Mehmood : Ayyo muruga… ye dyevi nai ji … ye to dyeva hai…
Ajit: Saara shehar mujhe Lion ke naam se jaanta hai. May I know your name please
Customer : Mona
Ajit: Mona darling. Tumne hamein call kyun kiya
Customer : (Angrily) I WANT YOUR MANAGER
Ajit: Mona dear, Agar hum tumhe hamara manager de denge to hamein manage kaun karega.
Gabbar:HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHA….Jo dargaya wo maraga… batao tumhen kya chahiye
Customer : I want to buy a product from your company
Gabbar: Kitne paise hai re
Customer : $ 10.00
Gabbar: Suaar Ke baccho, sirf$10.00, dhikkaar hai
Prem Chopra: Prem…Prem naam hai mera.. Prem chopra…
Customer : I lost my invoice I need one
Prem Chopra: Kar bhalaa to ho bhalaa..jaa apni invoice khud dhoondle
Rajkumar : Jaani, Tumhara ye call bahut keemti hai.. Ise cut mat karna
Customer: I lost my invoice
Rajkumar: Jaani… ye invoice hai.. Bacchon ke khelne ki cheez nahi
Customer : shut up.. I need my invoice sent to me in 10 minutes… otherwise I will speak to your manager
Rajkumar : Dhamki kisi aur ko jaakar dena, manager humko dara sake manager mein itna dum nahi, humse hai manager, manager se hum nahi.
Lastly…
Shahrukh: Thank you for kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkk (Stuck at K) Customer hung up the phone…
Latest Bollywood Jokes for Status
👉Family watching TV
Husband to Wife: Who is Sunny Leone?
Son(9 year old): The one, whose videos you're hiding in your PC, in Sunny Deol folder!
parivaar TV dekh raha tha,
pati se patni: sanee leone kaun hai?
beta (9 varsh ka): vah, jiske veediyo aap apane pc mein chhipa rahe hain, sunny deol folder mein!
parivaar TV dekh raha tha,
pati se patni: sanee leone kaun hai?
beta (9 varsh ka): vah, jiske veediyo aap apane pc mein chhipa rahe hain, sunny deol folder mein!
👉1. Rajnikant in DHOOM 22
2. Golmaal-15 ready 4 release.
3. Shahid, Saif attended Kareena's 8th wedding.
4. Petrol-984 rs/litre.
5. Shahrukh khan's daughter becomes a heroine
with Amitabh Bachhan in a luv story titled: Cheeni Khatam
6. CID completed 10,00,000 episodes.
7. Nokia launches new phone..wid facilities lyk...
20 sim card,500 gb in built memory, camera,music
player,TV,fridge & washin machine in phone.
8. Ram gopal varma's phoonk-23 again failed at
box office.
9. India beat brazil in fifa world
10. Nepal beats india by 10 wickets in cricket.
11. rahul gandhi still watching chhota bheem
12. Set Max Channel formally re-named as
SOORYAVANSHAM MAX
13. Kejriwal speak --abhi hum hai ji ,hum fir ayenge ji.
👉Aaj ki date 2-12
Zindagi na milegi 2-12
Maut na milegi 2-12
Pyar na hoga 2-12
Dil na tutega 2-12
Ye sab na hoga 2-12
So enjoy friend kyuki zindagi na milegi 2-12.
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