One Serious Request to All

One serious request to all please do not exchange Rs 500 or 1000 with your local sabji wala, small vendors, thela wala, they may not be aware of the fact and may not hold a bank account too.
It may be complete loss to them.
I know u hav forwarded dozens of jokes.
Forwarding this will help many poor people.

May God Vishvkarma

May God Vishkarma Crafts ur life Divinely;
Sculpts it to perfection;
And Engineers it to function smoothly.

Happy Vishkarma Day

Everyday Sun Rise

Everyday sun rise to give us A message that darkness Will always be beaten by light.
Let us follow the same Natural rule and enjoy the Festival of ‘Good defeats Evil’.
Happy Dusshera !

Happy Teachers Day To All

Happy Teachers' Day to all married women ...
Who teach lessons of life to their husbands daily ...
and most of the syllabus is covered on Sundays / holidays ...

Makhan Churakar Jisne Khaya

Makhan churakar jisne khaya,
Bansi bajakar jisne nachaya,
Khushi manayo uske janmadin ki,
Jisne duniya ko prem ka path padhaya.
Wish you a very happy shri krishan janamashtami.

What is Prayer?

✨I L♡ved this interpretation of *Prayer*
Prayer* doesn't just happen when we _kneel_  or put our hands together and focus and expect things from God....
Thinking _positive and wishing good for others_ - is a *Prayer*
When you _hug a friend_ - That's  a *Prayer*
When you _cook something to nourish family and friends_-  That's a *Prayer*
When we send off our near and dear ones and say _'Drive Safely' or 'Be Safe'_ - That's a *Prayer*
When you are _helping someone in need by giving your time and energy_ - You are *Praying*
When you _forgive some one by your heart_ ...that is *Prayer*.
Prayer is a _Vibration_- A feeling - A *Thought*.
Prayer is the _voice of love, friendship, genuine relationships_.
Prayer is an expression of your silent being*. 

Father is the Spine in the Body

Father is the spine in the body that supports the whole frame...
the mother is the hands legs etc that cares for the child...
If the spine was not there . .
The rest of the body is helpless. ..
hence we need to give thanks to the SPINE that represents our Father ..
Without which u would not be healthy educated sound in mind and able to build your own nest.

Friend From Punjab

Friend from Punjab: What's this controversy about Udta Punjab?
Me: Censor board issue. Because it's depicting drug problem in Punjab.
Friend: Bullshit. There is no drug problem in Punjab. You can get it easily.

In Childhood


In childhood, I remember my father used to get me chocolates...
n ask me to share with all family members before I eat...
Today I forgot the taste and name of that chocolate...
but learnt and experienced the "joy of giving"
Today we as parents give equal chocolates...
same toys to both our kids...
And tell them..."tum apna khao... tum apna khelo... jhagda mat karo"....
Here we are not teaching peace...
but teaching them how to think "only for self".
And kids start using words like "my chocolate ...my toys....my life... my choice"
"My" is nothing but ego...
And once ego comes, wisdom leaves...
only knowledge is left behind !!!
Teach your children to never walk alone in life and on the path to prosperity...
Teach them to bring others with them too...
Love others and make them prosperous too...
Spread love and happiness..

Wife was in the ICU

Wife was in the ICU!!
The husband was unable to control his tears.
Doctor: We are trying our best, but can't guarantee anything. Her body is not reacting. It seems she is in a coma.

Husband: Doctor please save her. She is just 30 years old and the family needs her.

Suddenly, something happened. Miraculously, the ECG started beeping like crazy. A hand moved, her lips mumbled.

And she spoke:

Darling, I'm 29, not 30.

Engineer To Inspector


An engineer went to police station for filing report for his missing wife.....
Engineer : I lost my wife (misty) ,she went for shopping and still not reached home yet
Inspector: What is her height ?
Engineer: I never noticed ...
.
Inspector: Slim or healthy ?
Engineer: Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Colour of eyes ?
Engineer: Never noticed...
Inspector: Colour of hair ?
Engineer: Changes according to season...
Inspector: What was she wearing ?
.
Engineer: Saree/suit/ I don’t remember exactly...
Inspector: Was she going in a car ?
Engineer: yes..
Inspector : tell me the number ,name and color of the car ?
Engineer: black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 liter V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight- speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode.
And it has full LED headlights, which use light emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door ….
And then the engineer started crying…..
Inspector: Don't worry sir,
hum gaadi dhoond lenge..

Clean Your Heart Daily


‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌Clean your heart daily with forgiveness.
‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‍‌Avoid jealousy to keep yourself nourished always.
‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‍Sprinkle yourself with love, it is the sweetest perfume.
‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‍Wear a smile to give your face a perfect glow.

Modi To Obama

Mr. Modi to Obama : How do you manage to grow your country so nicely . . ????
Obama : It's because of Indians . . .
Mr. Modi shocked : How because of Indians . . ?
Obama : You give jobs to Reserved Indians and we give the jobs to the Deserved Indians.

Bhangre Paiye


Bhangre paiye, Gidhe paiye,
Aao sare milke Baisakhi da tyohaar manaiye, 
Tuhanu sareyan nu Baisakhi de tyohaar di lakh-lakh wadai hove ji...

When Big B Was Singing


When Big B was singing the National anthem,
rekha was very impressed and stood up
to approach him for a hug,
seeing this big B sang the last lines very loudly"
Jaya hai......jaya hai..... Jaya...... Jaya....Jaya...... Jaya hai"

Mission Holi


Niklo galiyo mein bana k toli,
bhiga do aaj har ladki ki jholi,
muskura de to usey bahon mein bhar lo..
varna nikal lo keh k HAPPY HOLI..!!.....
Happy holi to all...

Shiv Ki Jyoti Se Noor Milta Hai



SHIV ki jyoti se noor milta hai,
Sabke dil ko surur milta hai,
Jo bhi jata hai BHOLE ke dwaar,
Kuchh na kuchh zarror milta hai,
"JAI BABA AMARNATH"
Happy Shivratri to all of you..

ICC World T20 2016


Mar 15: IND vs NZ        Nagpur
Mar 16: WI vs ENG       Mumbai
Mar 16: PAK vs Q2       Kolkata
Mar 17: SL vs Q1          Kolkata
Mar 18: AUS vs NZ      Dharmasala
Mar 18: SA vs ENG      Mumbai
Mar 19: IND vs PAK     Dharmasala
Mar 20: SA vs Q1         Mumbai
Mar 20: SL vs WI          Bangalore
Mar 21: AUS vs Q2       Bangalore
Mar 22: NZ vs PAK       Mohali
Mar 23: ENG Vs Q1      Delhi
Mar 23: IND Vs Q2       Bangalore
Mar 25: PAK Vs AUS    Mohali
Mar 25: SA vs WI          Nagpur
Mar 26: Q2 vs NZ         Kolkata
Mar 26: ENG vs SL       Delhi
Mar 27: IND vs AUS     Mohali
Mar 27: Q1 vs WI          Nagpur
Mar 28: SA vs SL          Delhi
Mar 30: Semifinal 1     Delhi
Mar 31: Semifinal 2     Mumbai
Apr 3   : FINAL             Kolkata

Rs 251 Mobiles Online


For all those who are trying to get Rs 251 mobiles online and are not succeeding, do not get disheartened...
Patanjali mobiles are being launched shortly by Ramdev Bells Haridwar Ltd..at RS 151....
Purely Ayurvedic Mobile...
It will emit only Neem and Pudina flavoured radiations....

How to Make 5 Crores in 6 Months



How to make 5 crores in 6 months :-
1. Make a mobile manufacturing company.
2. Make an announcement that we will sell smartphone for Rs.251/- delivery after 6 months.
3. Get foolish media attention (Free advertisement).
4. 50 lakh idiots will book your phone on 1st day.
5. 50lakh * Rs.251 = Rs.125crores.
6. Deposit 125 crores into Bank for 5 months. After six months get 125 crores + Interest approx 6 crores.
7. Return back Rs.251 to public saying "sorry we could not complete the order"
8. Go to world tour.

Share With All Lovely Ladies


 A man thanked God for giving him a good wife.
He asked God,
"why did u make my wife so loving & caring?"
God replied: "so that u love her"
The man further asked:
"Why did u make her so beautiful and gorgeous❓
God replied: "so that u love her"
The man again asked:
"Why did u make her an amazing cook"
God replied: "so that u love her"
The man then angrily asked:
"But then why did u make her such a fool❓
God said: "so that SHE CAN love you too...!
All wives ROCK..

A Punjabi Opened a Tea Stall


A Punjabi opened a Tea stall in China & Named it ""Punjab Tea Stall".
He got no business for a long time and was about to close down when someone told him to have a more Chinese Name for his tea stall if he wanted to succeed in China.
After struggling for a name he got grand success when he kept the new name.
"Ko Si Ko Si Chaa Fu Ke Fu Ke Pee.''

Wife on Valentine Day


Wife (On valentine's day): Kya gift du..?
Husband: Pyaar se dekha karo, Izzat karo, Tameez se baat kiya karo...Yehi kaafi hai...

Wife: Nahi, me to gift hi dungi......!!!!!

Headlines of 2050



1. Rajnikant in DHOOM 22
2. Golmaal-15 ready 4 release.
3. Shahid, Saif attended Kareena's 8th wedding.
4. Petrol-984 rs/litre.
5. Shahrukh khan's daughter becomes a heroine
with Amitabh Bachhan in a luv story titled: Cheeni Khatam
6. CID completed 10,00,000 episodes.
7. Nokia launches new phone..wid facilities lyk...
20 sim card,500 gb in built memory, camera,music
player,TV,fridge & washin machine in phone.
8. Ram gopal varma's phoonk-23 again failed at
box office.
9. India beat brazil in fifa world
10. Nepal beats india by 10 wickets in cricket.
11. rahul gandhi still watching chhota bheem
12. Set Max Channel formally re-named as
SOORYAVANSHAM MAX
13. Kejriwal speak --abhi hum hai ji ,hum fir ayenge ji.

Employee To Boss


Employee to Boss : Sir Chhutti chahiye
Boss : ek shart par milegi, ye batao, Katappa ne Bahubali ko kyon mara?
Employee: Sir, Katappa ko Chhutti nahi di hogi...
(presently the employee is on 60 days of Annual Paid Leave)

Girlfriend to Boyfriend


Gf: "Teri ZIP khul nahi rahi yaar"
Bf: "Thoda aur try kar"
Gf: "Kar to rahi hoon.
Nahi khul rahi"
Bf: "Accha ruk. PDF bhejta hoon".

Create & Spread Happiness


"Adjustment with Right people is always better than arguments with Wrong people.
And Meaningful Silence is always better than Meaningless Words..!!
"No one is born happy, but we all are born with the ability to create happiness..!!"
Create & spread HAPPINESS!!

Wife to Husband


Wife :=Window ka lock ni khul rha hai…
Husband := aisa kro thoda oil garam kr ke us pr daal do…
Wife := Kya us se lock khul jaega?
Husband := Try to kro
After 15 mints
Husband calls wife Tum ne try kia?
Wife:= Han kia, par ab to Laptop hi Off ho gaya hai
Husband:= Jahil Aurat Window to batati konsi hai…
Wife:= 8.1 hai..

Girl to Boy


Girl: Mujhe i-Phone lena hai...
Boy : to le le....
Girl : kon si company ka lu??
Boy : Patanjali ka le. . Usme virus aur Bacteria nahi hote...

Doing Paath Everyday


Doing Paath Everyday...
Why do we do paath, even if we can't understand or remember ????
This is beautiful story - if inspired, please forward, else keep it, cant say when it might inspire you !
Story:
An old sikh Farmer lived on a farm in the mountains with his young grandson.
Each morning Grandpa was up early sitting at the kitchen table doing his paath. His grandson wanted to be just like him and tried to imitate him in every way he could.
One day the grandson asked, "Grandpa! I try to do paath just like you but I don't understand it, and what I do understand I forget as soon as I close the book. What good does doing paath everyday do?"
The Grandfather quietly turned from putting coal in the stove and replied,
"Take this coal basket down to the river and bring me back a basket of water."
The boy did as he was told, but all the water leaked out before he got back to the house. The grandfather laughed and said, "You'll have to move a little faster next time," and sent him back to the river with the basket to try again. This time the boy ran faster, but again the basket was empty before he returned home. Out of breath, he told his grandfather that it was impossible to carry water in a basket, and he went to get a bucket instead.
The old man said, "I don't want a bucket of water; I want a basket of water. You're just not trying hard enough," and he went out the door to watch the boy try again.
At this point, the boy knew it was impossible, but he wanted to show his grandfather that even if he ran as fast as he could, the water would leak out before he got back to the house.
The boy again dipped the basket into river and ran hard, but when he reached his grandfather the basket was again empty. Out of breath, he said, "See Grandpa, it's useless!"
"So you think it is useless ?" The old man said, "Look at the basket."
The boy looked at the basket and for the first time realized that the basket was different. It had been transformed from a dirty old coal basket and was now clean, inside and out.
"Son, that's what happens when you do paath. You might not understand or remember everything, but when you do paath, you will be changed, inside and out. That is the work of WaheGuru in our lives."
Wahe Guru Ji Ka Khalsa,
Wahe Guru Ji Ki Fateh!